I had a most interesting and fun day...
A young woman that works in our Mission Office and also happens to be the National Public Affairs Director for Uganda is getting married on Dec. 28th. There are many single women and men here because the men cannot afford to pay "bride price" to the family of the bride, so they do not marry until later in life. (Think of the movie "Johnnie Lingo and the 8 Cow Wife" -- that is just what happens here, they have to pay with cows or land or money or food in order to get permission to marry a girl.) Anyway, Sussie is a delightful African woman who has served a mission and has graduated from college. She is one of the smartest people I have met. She is Kenyan and was raised by her father from the age of 2 because her parents separated. She joined the Church when she was 12 because she had 2 old sisters who had joined and they took her along with them. Both of her parents have died. She is probably the only one of her sisters that is employed and has a good job and so she helps many people in her family and in the village. I heard that the people in the office make about $500 a month and are some of the best paid employees in the country.
Anyway, our Mission President's wife decided that we should have a bridal shower for Sussie as Sussie was not having a reception because of the cost. Sussie was so nervous, she had no idea what a bridal shower was. She invited 24 friends and all 24 came. It was at the President's home today. We had Hawaiian haystacks, fruit kabobs, homemade rolls, fruit slush, ice cream and brownies. She had no idea that people would bring presents. Here they do not give presents for Christmas or birthday or weddings. Sometimes they will contribute to the wedding budget to help cover the expenses, but no gifts. So, after lunch we moved into the living room and Sister Wallace handed Sussie a gift to open and she literally did not realize it was for her and she was to open it. Everyone brought a gift or went in on a gift with several others so there were lots of gifts. Sister Chatfield had put on the invitation that if you wanted to donate to a group gift you could -- it was a kitchen shower. Anyway, every gift she opened the whole room would Ooh! and Ahh! It was so fun; they were all so excited for her. And the games, they loved them. They were so competitive. They also played the game where they had asked the groom questions about himself and they then asked Sussie to see if she could give the same answers and to see how well she knew the groom, Moses. They usually do not hold hands in public here or show any public affection, so Sussie would laugh and put her hand over her face when they asked her some questions about him. Everyone would laugh at her...they had so much fun.
It was just delightful. No one wanted to leave. It was to have started at noon but no one except the Senior Sister Missionaries came until 1:00. It was 4:00 before we finished and got home. I thought about it and wondered if it is right for us to expose them to our culture -- especially the gift giving.
They keep life so simple and are so kind and giving anyway -- but have never done the gift giving like we do in the United States. But, they seemed to love the entire afternoon. I asked one of Sussie's friends if they do anything similar to a shower in their culture and she said "No, but friends would have taken Sussie to one of her auntie's in the village where Sussie was raised and the auntie would have talked to them about how to treat a husband."
Anyway, it was a fun memory of some beautiful African women experiencing their first American style bridal shower.
And just a side note...in Uganda they have to be married in the country before they can go to be sealed in the Johannesburg Temple in order for the country to recognize the marriage. Sussie and Moses are being sealed in Johannesburg the first week of January 2014.
Sussie, in traditional African dress, with Moses (on her left) and his family and friends that escorted him to her village in Kenya to ask for permission to marry.
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